Tuesday 1 June 2010

Edinburgh's Interior Decor

I shit you not, it's happening!
It's only fuckin' happening!

I'm doing a show. Edinburgh Fringe. In August.
It's with John Osborne (Radio Head, What If Men Burst In Wearing Balaclavas? The Newsagent's Window) and Patrick Lappin (used to live in that pub on Ber St.), and I can't really believe it's all happening.

Paddy (as I like to call him) is a rock.
No. He's more than that. He's the sexy bit. The charmer. The rogue.
He can make you wet your knickers in fear.
But he's solid.
A grafter.
Extremely reliable and very hard-wearing.
He's a wall.
A sexy wall.
He's a bathroom wall.

Jozzers (as I like to call him) is pretty.
You look & listen to him, and your heart melts & your head goes a bit fuzzy.
He's a beautiful man.
But he's very straight-edged.
(And I don't mean in a tee-total,gay,abstainer way)
He's got great lines. Straight,dependable,necessary lines.
And he shines. And I know all about shining.
non luceo uro ;-)
For an OCD'er like me, he's my perfect accompaniment to Paddy.
Paddy's wall.
He's a ceramic tile.
A bathroom ceramic tile.

And me?
I'm the grout.

It's happening!
It's only fuckin' happening!


THE 100 GREATEST SWISS BEEKEEPERS. EVER!
'Three Sisters' - Room With A View (Opposite Underbelly)
August 20th-30th